MEMO



To: Scum of the Universe

Subject: Position Openings within Thunder Team Inc.

From: =TT= Personnel Division*

Gentlebeings,

Due to changes in the Galactic Economy and an internal restructuring, our company is currently hiring for a variety of positions. Please see below for opportunities in Thunder Team Inc.

Job Title: Thug

Positions available: 1-3

Job Description: Looking to put those appendage breaking skill to use in a lucrative and creative way, then apply here! We are looking for thugs of all shapes and sizes. Some skill with blasters, firearms, turbolasers, blunt objects, bludgeoning objects, pointy objects, sharp objects or combination thereof are required. People skills are required, specifically: throwing people from balconies, intimidating people, making veiled threats, making overt threats, growling, and off color jokes are excellent examples.

Benefits: Medical, Optical, Dental (you can keep everything you knock out), we also offer a generous retirement package working for Cormba the Hutt on Nogales IV.



Job Title: Korronian Ice Weasel Handler

Positions available: One, but we go through them pretty fast

Job Description: Do you have skills in handling vicious adult Korronian Ice weasels? How about running illegal racing operations? Maybe you’re just curious, either way; this might be the job for you. Primary duties consist of breeding, grooming, feeding and racing 1200 kilo Korronian Ice Weasels for use in illegal betting operations.

Benefits: Medical (this is an easy one to throw in, Korronian Ice weasels usually swallow the victim whole) and a 10% cut on the house take.



Job Title: Accountant and Tax Preparer

Positions available: One

Job Description: Are you creative with numbers? Can you make a million credit windfall look like a 20K operating loss? Are you good at cooking books? If so, this position might be right for a Gentlebeing like you. We are in need of a creative accountant to manage the fiscal losses and gains of our company. Moral ambiguity is a must. A strong back is also required for moving large crates of hard currency and experience with a shovel and treasure maps is also encouraged.

Benefits: Medical, Optical, and your family receive a wonderful opportunity. Those dear and close to you will be secreted away in a secure location unknown to you. There, they will be carefully guarded by a legion of passionless assassin droids who eagerly await to hear about your continuing loyalty to Thunder Team Corporation.



Job Title: Commodore Flash Meltdown Body Doubles

Positions available: As many as we can get

Job Description: Want to be famous, but just can’t seem to manage it? Why not step into the shoes of somebody really famous! We are looking for humans who either look like Flash Meltdown or are willing to undergo extensive cosmetic modification in order to do so. Job duties require traveling to various hives of scum and villainy as well as numerous public appearances. Public speaking skills and redundant organs are a plus.

Benefits: Epaulets, Commodore’s hat, and all the attention you can stand.



Job Title: Sullustian Dancing Girls

Positions available: 4-6

Job Description: Are your ears and cheek jowls under-appreciated in the dim light of Sullust’s tunnels? Ever want to see the galaxy on the arm of a dangerous and handsome Sullustian outlaw? Do you look as hot as a tub of Gelgelar Eels ready to peel? Take your good looks to the stars! Our company is looking to hire various dancing girls for entertaining our guests and employees. No fat chicks.

Benefits: Medical, Optical, Dental, and all the ear-waxing you need.



All inquires and applications may be sent to:

Abek Farlighter
Bob’s Starport Services
Nogales IV

Please enclose your resume, an 8x10 glossy color holo, three references and your rap sheet.

Note: Thunder Team Incorporated in not an equal opportunity employer. Humans are discouraged. When we say discouraged, it means that you better be really useful to us or we’ll sell you into slavery on Omze’s. Still, if you are that good and you slip up, we just might do it anyway. Alien applicants will receive special consideration for all positions. Near Humans are near enough for us to dislike, so what goes for humans goes for you too!

*Not to be confused with =TT= Anti-Personnel Division, not responsible for damages to applicants who go through the wrong door.